One of my clients immersed in the Personal Foundation Program is working on zapping her “Tolerations.” Tolerations (when pluralized not an actually word) are those things we are “putting up with” – rather than handling. A toleration could be anything from your partner’s bad breath to a messy desk that drives you crazy, to a client who doesn’t pay on time – and millions of other things.
The problem with tolerations is they suck the life out of you. Much more energy goes into avoiding or putting up with something that is gnawing at you rather than learning how to eliminate or transform it.
There is also a vast distinction between putting up with something (tolerating) versus accepting it.
Today that same client asked me if accepting something wouldn’t simply mean “giving up” and just dealing with it?
It depends. Are you “surrendering” (letting go) or acquiescing?
Accepting could mean “letting go” – accepting how it is and how it isn’t – very different from “acquiescing.” Giving up could be a positive form of surrender or letting go of something having to be a certain way. Notice the different “energy” in your body whether you are putting up with something, acquiescing to it or letting it go.
Make a list of what you are tolerating and decide what you are going to do about it. Email me if you would like the tolerations worksheet.